The Funk

One of the many things my Yoga Training taught me was to fully love and accept myself. Truly a magical gift that has left me happy beyond all measure but recently I have discovered its side effects. No longer do I posses the motivation for simple goals like working as a yogi, finishing my book, getting fit, finding a significant other, and so forth… No, instead I’m so blissfully content with my life that I have been stuck in rut of laziness. No longer do I pursue my dreams of wonder instead I just to work and eat to get through the day, trying to leave my room as little as possible. I have become frustrated of those around me, annoyed with their insecurities and dissatisfied nature. And when those people ask me what my plans are for the future I reply that I am at peace with my situation in life and am taking each moment as they come. 

The scary thing is... It’s the truth.

No longer do I strive to be anything better than I am because why try to be someone that isn't yourself. Yes, it’s a good thing to be happy with what you got and know that you only need yourself for completion but I’m twenty-two years old. Twenty-two years old should be working towards something other than moving out (even though that is a very important goal, it shouldn’t be my only one). They should be working towards an unattainable future, finding "the one", and having the most amazing adventures with friends. 

Yet, somehow, Spain aged me and took away my youth, my fun, my dreams. It's taken away everything that makes me, well, me. 

To be fair it wasn’t just Spain. It has been these past couple of year. Or maybe it has nothing to do with Spain at all. Maybe it’s something else entirely. 

The truth is I don’t know what’s up with me. But what I do know is that I have been in this funk since April 6^th, since my last day of Yoga Training. And I don't know about you, but I think two and a half months is way to long for a funk to last.

Hopefully I will be able to get out of it soon, but to be honest, I don’t know how and I’m a little bit scared. So if any of you have any ideas or suggestions, they would be most appreciated.

HKx